I hear you, Universe. You thought that killing off so many celebrities would lure me back to Dish. Prince, Gene Wilder, and Chyna couldn't do it. Not even Hillary's pneumonia and the coverage of her every sniffle (screw you, by the way, media). But when you tear asunder the union that created the Uber Papparazzi movement, I have to say Nay. I will not lie calmly and take this abuse.
Actually, I don't care about Bland and Angina so much. My shock waned by daybreak. The little bits about his fondling Russian hookers and mixing substances, well, if I had so many responsibilities I would definitely...okay, no, I wouldn't be so insane. My worst is the Ambien shopping (where did this Reese Witherspoon DVD come from???). But I get it. The signs have been received. It's a big deal for us star-gazers and I'm here to say, I'm back. For now.
Just when I got comfortable, the news came that Liev and Naomi broke up. I checked my crystal ball predictions from a few years ago and found a log of insights into their love: doomed. Not out of knowledge but pure girl gut reaction when I heard him speak at the Rubin museum. He was asked what made him happy. His answer was that only his children keep him going/make him happy. I thought, What about Naomi? My basic feeling is that, yes, children matter a whole lot, but so does one's partner. Stay away from my husband, batches!
One last thing, Universe. Don't you dare break up Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton. Their love is keeping my sanity intact.
And now, to find a channel that is covering the presidential debate.