Even Silent, I'm Still Always Thinking of the Stars

So much has happened this week. Every time a new event occurred, I kept wanting to blog, but I didn't. Now, I'm overflowing:

I read Brandi Glanville's Drinking and Tweeting in one sitting. Then I did Pilates. Then I ate a bag of chips. This was a stirring, can't-put-down read. It's juicy--and short! She forgot to note that Eddie Cibrian also killed off Vanished once Gale Harold left. Throughout the reading, I felt sorry for Cibrian and LeAnn Rimes, just because it's such a lame tale with a big cloud over it unless LeAnn gets pregnant or revives career bigtime. At least Brandi has majorly risen from the ashes. Again, I want her to be my life coach.  

In couple news: Rhea Perlman and Danny DeLimoncello are reconciling. Eh, might as well...It's tough out there in the dating world.

Julianne Hough and Ryan Seacrest have split because she doesn't have a penis. In a brilliant move, Julianne somehow had 100K of jewelry he gave her magically stolen. You go, girl!

So it seems the fans of Veronica Mars have flocked to kickstarter.com to fund a movie. Dish never watched this show but now I'm thinking...why not a Kickstarter campaign to bring back Swingtown or Queer As Folk (I know it'll never happen)? What other shows do you miss?

Perhaps the most embarrassing thing I watched this week--though I love these two and feel they've kind of paved a path for fun, no-holds barred lady morning viewing.

The Bachelor Finale--Spoiler

First of all, Dish read a spoiler to The Bachelor, which ruined everything. Never again! Oh wait, I said that last season. This time around, I felt there was only one bad apple in the whole caboose (that makes no sense, Dish)--the evil and clueless Tiera. All the other girls seemed nice. A few weren't exactly intelligent, but who cares? I'm fine with Sean's choice of Catherine, though I have the feeling she might bail later on when she realizes he's kind of nice and predictable. But that's just me, being negative. My real excitement over the finale comes with the announcement of the new Bachelorette: Katie Holmes Desiree Hartsock! She was the one I'd wanted Sean to pick toward the end.

And now, I can go back to life as usual.

Oh, and in stupid fun news: Gerard Butler finally admitted that he slept with Brandi Glanville. He just didn't remember her name. That just makes him so much more attractive, doesn't it?

Such as.

Brandi Glanville's Telling All

I've got to hand it to this woman--she's made a name for herself as a scorned wife. She's pisssssed. I'll admit, I enjoy her immensely on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills even though the vaginal rejuvenation (to get a man's essence out of your hoo-ha) is a giant overshare. Did we know anything about her before LeAnn Rimes stole her mans? Not really, and I keep track of celebrities and their spouses and their cousins. When Cibrian took over for Gale Harold on Vanished (what a mess that was), he and Brandi were happily married Iwas dating another loser. But now it's over, he's married the woman he cheated with (where is Gale Harold these days) and Brandi's stock keeps going up. Being enraged can make you really really rich.I keep saying to myself I will not buy her book, I will not feed the gossip machine (I totally will, love her).

Dan Marino had a love child with CBS employee. Dishlesson #1: Never date an athlete.

Real Housewives of BH--A Lesson in Manners

This is how I know Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is fake, fake, fake. It makes no sense that at Mauricio's company party, Kim would choose that moment to reveal to Adrienne/Paul (the scariest couple ever) that Brandi Mistress of Truth dropped a bomb about A&P behind their backs. Two questions: Who does that and what *is* the scandal Brandi unveiled about the Maloof/Na--somethings? There might be strange mental wiring involved on Kim's part--she has her moments--but -- okay I would have done the same thing if the cameras were on me. Can I hire Brandi to be my life coach?

I should be reading my New Yorker but got distracted when I learned that Anne Hathaway flashed her delicate flower accidentally there are no accidents at an event. This kept me busy. All websites have covered her maidenly undercarriage. They certainly didn't do the same for Britney Spears, Lindsay or poor Denise Richards! Where's the justice?

Good deed: Don't tell TG but I tipped the deliboys10$ for making me a delicious turkey club sandwich. Celebrities often double-tip, so I figured I was in good company. It made me feel great.