Julia/Julie Copycat Challenge--Dish-style

At the end of March, when my schedule dies down, I'm on a mission to go where stars hang out. Each week, I want to squat in a star-studded location (will do literal squatting with donation of 50$) and scope out The Bigger People. I have huge Olsen Twins sunglasses for the occasion. Any ideas where I should go?

I've Lowered Myself

Dish has to keep up with the times. I swore never to watch Jersey Shore (also said this about Paris Hilton sex tape), but my colleagues feel I'll care about these thugs by the end of the season. This is exactly what happened with The Real Housewives of New York, though my fascination had more to do with schadenfreude. Everyone on that show is heinous and I longed to witness their treachery week after week. The Jersey Shore freaks are too young for my derision so I'm guessing I'll want to mother and homeschool them. If I press the button for Episode 2, I'm in trouble.

Barbra University

Dish trekked way uptown to meet TG at his workplace. We walked around these familiar surroundings and I exclaimed, "This is where The Mirror Has Two Faces was filmed!" TG is one of the few hetero XYs who's viewed this masterpiece and he acknowledged we were at Columbia University where Dr. Barbra Streisand taught English. I informed him that if he played his cards right, we could watch the flick together. Instead, TG and I looked in the mirror and realized just how good looking he is. No need for a black dress and vegetable plate for him.

Serious Moonlight

My eyes have been assaulted so I had to call my life coach for crisis counseling. Just when Meg Ryan starts to look good again, she stars in Serious Moonlight. Note to Meg: Don't star in movies with Timothy Hutton. He's very good but far more enigmatic as the cool aged guy in suspenseful dramas. I now understand why Meg's career has plummetted since Proof of Life. The Rx is obvious: Meg needs Dish to choose her projects.

Okay, I'll share. Serious Moonlight is about a wife who duct-tapes her husband when she finds out he's cheating with a younger woman whose eyes are set too close together (Kristin Bell). At least Meg and Kristin are both blond. Any deviation from Hollywood-gold tresses would give me DTs. The story smells like French Kiss where Meg was similarly obsessed with Timothy Hutton. Kevin Kline, a talented actress/director and cast can't save this stinker. I only got through 15 minutes.

Oh, Meg. You have one last chance. Let Dish help you shine again.

Kathy on SVU

My heart is racing after two viewings of Kathy Griffin's clip on the 3/3 Law & Order: SVU. Kathy gets to enjoy a lesbian kiss with Mariska Hargitay. It's every girl's dream come true and Kathy now has something better than two Emmys. Yes, Dish would swim the Atlantic Ocean and walk a tightrope between the Waldorf and Chrysler buildings for such an opportunity (as long as it doesn't jeopardize my relationship with TG). It's Mariska, for goodness sakes, who is a direct descendant of the Cosmic Goddess.

Next Sign of the Apocalypse

Regis and Joy Philbin have an album coming out where they SING. They performed one of their songs on The View. I really, really want to die. At least I found the perfect gift for TG's birthday.

Some cute news, cranky judge Simon Cowell got engaged. And here I thought there was homoerotic subtext between him and Ryan Seacrest on Idol.

What makes up for this is that Dish has a snow day. So many movies to watch...

12$ Back in Dish's Pocket!

I love the paparrazzi: they take so many pics of filming that I never have to see the movie in a theater. For instance, Angelina Jolie is filming The Tourist in Paris, with Johnny Depp. Doesn't she look amazing in cream? Such a departure from the usual boring black. From the pic, I know something mysterious is going on and she can read! Can't wait to see evidence of her sizzling chemistry with Depp. You know they will make fire together. I wouldn't put it past Angie to slip him tongue, but Johnny seems to have more integrity.

Random Question

As I toiled in an unrelated field, the question popped into my head:

Is Shirley MacLaine getting any?

I hope so. Note to self: purchase Out on a Leash, though think it's not about gay S&M but canine ownership. Rats!

Love ya, Shirl, even beyond this life.