Just Call Me Algernon!!!

My fast couldn't last forever, right? For 72 hours, Dish was coherent, going back to her brainiac and 50s housewife ways with ironing, reading heady literature and grooving on the To Do list. I blame Sylvester Stallone!

Okay, Dr. Phils, it's my own fault. I rented Daylight so that I could investigate Sacha Stallone's acting. He's better than his dad, but the whole movie sucks serious ass. Of course, struggling writer Amy Brenneman is going to live in a grungy New York apartment with cockroaches. Of course, because she's poor, she's going to have long frizzy hair and wear floral dresses. Of course, she keeps getting rejection letters just as thugs hang out near her door, looking for a chance to B&E because she's a victim and secretly pretty. Thank goodness she has 5 locks on that door (but no bars on the windows). Hmmmm, as she drives toward the Lincoln Tunnel, ya think she's going to encounter adventure? 

Then I went to a reading of my high school friend's fantastic book in the West Village. I even wore heels, a rarity since I like to be able to run away fast. I'm reading Pema Chodron and she encourages you to run toward the hairy dragon instead of away. A flock of us girls gabbed the night away--someone mentioned someone seeing Uma Thuman's actual breasts and we agreed they are magnificent--and reminisced about crazy days of yore.

After this, I had nowhere to do but down so I checked my TMZ, then my Facebook. Just once or twice. Holy bananas, Andy Williams passed away, then Johnny Lewis killed his landlady and then fell to his death. Two celebrities expire in 24 hours? The rate of death is speeding up, you wily Mayans. Now I *really* have to watch Sons of Anarchy in earnest before time itself stops.

Oh, and KD Lang is back on the market (I have a girl crush on her voice) and US Weekly is claiming that all is not well in the Jef Holm/Emily Maynard union. How is that possible?

I'll try to be good for the rest of the night, but FB narcissism persists. Someone posted a pic of last night's festivities and I have to see all the comments, tabulate them, giggle over the attention, and then fantasize about superstardom.

No Facebook/Tabloids = Shocking Productivity

I wondered where the hell my brain went these last few years. Why was I not getting anything done? It's all Facebook and TMZ's fault. I adore them both to pieces, but I need a break. There is too much information.

So yesterday, on my Yom Kippuresque fast, I did laundry, read a few projects, made the bed, edited some grueling pages, answered many emails, listened to an inspiring self-hypnosis tape, bought new sponges, started a Pema Chodron book, ordered yarn, and basically kicked some ass.

Will repeat this today.

I also filled my mind with intellectual things: like I looked up "Coptic Christian" so that I could be up to date on the latest international crisis. I also learned a lot about Gonorrhea (esp. how to spell it) and that there's a new superbug strain that is resistant to drugs. Thanks, The New Yorker! Did you know Gonorrhea was given such an awesome-sounding name because the pus discharged was mistaken to be semen? Literally, it's "seed flow." I bet those scientists are embarrassed!

TG and I watched Piers Morgan's interview with Ahmadinejad. For the first forty-five minutes, the little king seemed reasonable with love/peace to everyone, let's not get into each other's butts when there's a conflict, sure a single woman can ski in Iran, blah di blah. Around 9:45, the crazy came out, i.e. questioning the holocaust, gays are bad, etc...It's sad this little pocket ruler with the sparkling eyes spews such weirdness (and sugar-coated hate).

My one brush with the stars was reading that Katie Couric was bulimic in college. I don't get making yourself barf. Anorexia seems so much easier. I was anorexic for a week when I was 15, living on 500 calories and running 5 miles a day. I then discovered all the ingredients for a delicious Dagwood sandwich in my mother's fridge. I've had periods where I'm so stressed I can't eat and always feel sick. I'm sure it's something close to anorexia. Food intake is the only thing I can control. My cure is usually delicious ice cream and chocolate.