Starbuns in the Oven?

It looks as if Channing Tatum does have sex with his wife since she might be carrying his almighty seed. I'm sorry, ladies. Dish is rooting for Jenna since she had the good taste to appear on American Horror Story. Not so much Channing because of Magic Mike which wasted precious minutes of my life.

A controversial topic of the last ten years has resurfaced. Is Jennifer Aniston finally pregnant? She's wearing baggier clothes and refusing alcohol. Sorry to say, Dish isn't buying it. I am also enjoying baggier attire since comfort is more appealing. Track suit, anyone? And because I sleep poorly and booze keeps me awake, I refuse the sauce. Plus, thanks to some fertility clinics, Dish knows the odds of her being preggo right about now. If she is, may the force be with her. She and Justin will have gorgeous children with fantastic comedic timing.

Dish is off on a short road trip that will wind up in the second row of Jersey Boys on Wednesday night!

Magic Mike Is Terrible

I really wanted to see this movie--though fell ill on the day I intended to cough up 13$. And thank goodness,  because it sucks! How many times can glorious Matthew McConaughey say, "Allright, allright, allright" in his precious twang? How boring is Channing's love interest and their romance? And how dare the creators keep hiding the baloney from devoted female/gay fans. This flick was pure tease with a deceptive trailer. For those who haven't seen it, save your dough. This is a transformation/coming of age story with boring dialogue. The most heinous crime is that it under-uses the bonerific talents of the werewolf from True Blood, Matt Bomer, Alex Pettycoats, and Channing Tatum--and McConaughey. They should have focused more on the stripping and made a Cinderella story for a girl to date a stripper--who is secretly rich and gives it all up for her!

If you've ever wanted to know who Dishmama has always reminded me of, watch this babe. This siren and my mother are practically separated at birth. But my mom is even more fabulous.

What Happened?

So yeah, something happened yesterday but I forget what it is, I was so busy watching The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills aka a fantastic antidote for the election venom. Now I thoroughly understand why people flee real life to watch reality TV. It's *so* not what our lives are like.

God bless Lisa, Adrienne, Yolande, Scary Mess, Brandi, Kyle, and the Drunk One. I am so ready to pull up a seat and lose myself in RHoBH after months and months of election coverage. Oh and what coverage it was. Here's Dish's roundup:

Anderson Cooper: Cute as a bug's ear.
Diane Sawyer: Allegedly wasted during coverage. Everyone's talking about it. I just think she had bad Botox and couldn't move any part of her face except for her mouth. You be the judge. Dish often talks like this after three hours of sleep. No, just rewatched. She was completely sh*tfaced.
John King: So in love with his board, it made me crazy. I kept watching him because I felt sorry for how obsessed he got. Then today he stood on same stage as ex-wife Dana Bash and both stuttered. Awwwwkkkkwarrrd.
Fox News: You know straight away who they're rooting for and I accept that, which makes the watch entertaining as sh*t.
Jon Stewart: I'm sorry, but this was not a time for funny. Lost interest after three minutes of shtick.
Donald Trump: His post-election Twitter diarrhea was hilarious! I see his purpose in the world. For us to ridicule him.

My bottom line is that I forgive Ohio for existing in 1991. Now we can go back to celebrities. Modern Family's Ariel Winter got out of dodge after allegedly living with an abusive mother. If I were her, I'd make a beeline for Sofia Vergara, who is awesomeness itself.

I heard a rumor that People is choosing Channing Tatum as its Sexiest Man Alive. Finally, a choice that is relevant and not so five years ago. Though he doesn't hold a candle to TG.