"Great Role Models for Other Married Couples"

Just when you thought it was safe to scour the internets for wholesome news items, this awesomeness hits you like a sharknado and you Can't Turn Away. I confess, Doug is fantastic actor and I sort of like Courtney Stodden. She's a rude interruptor with gigantic fun bags, but in twenty years, she might rule the world and we won't know how it happened. I suspect her IQ is freakishly high. For now, though, she's a guppy with 0 impulse control.

In Scientology, I scanned a list of celebrity devotees and found...Jeffrey Tambor, acting genius of Arrested Development. REALLY? I'm fascinated.

Today's divorce news: Natasha Henstridge--my very first girl crush--is splitting with her man. Could my ultimate star-fantasy come true, that she and her co-star from The Secret Circle Gale Harold did more than kiss on-screen (I didn't see it but can only assume)? Please say yes. Otherwise, I'll have to watch her with Michael Vartan in little known screen masterpiece It Had to Be You.

Spike Lee released his must watch movies--all men, mostly predictable.

The Bachelorette: Forgive me, feminists, but Brooks is a gigantic pu**y. He's just not that into you, Des.

Political Passings

Two daughters of political figures died within twenty-four hours of each other and at 51: Kara Kennedy, eldest daughter of Ted and Joan Kennedy, and Eleanor Mondale Poling, daughter of Walter and Joan Mondale. Very sad. My heart goes out to these families.

Life should be appreciated, right? Sinead O'Connor is to controversy as the Pope is to Being Behind the Times, thus it isn't odd that such a public figure would ask via Twitter for ways to commit suicide. Dish immediately started following her and went on her website: http://www.sineadoconnor.com. The site is quite a rambling-me-fest, which makes me think she'll stay alive. If not on Earth, where would the me-fest go? Her voice is from the gods.

Why reality shows rule: so many baaaadddd scripted shows. Dish watched The Secret Circle last night. Verdict: the teens are a big bore except for the one who thinks she's Angelina Jolie. Gale Harold and Natasha Henstridge are awesome and Dish hopes they have an ecstatic super-witch coupling, skyclad under the stars with moonbeams illuminating their fleshy middle-aged yet lightly muscled pale bodies. I will fast-forward to get to the adult scenes, as with Hellcats. Ringer just sucks. I expected more from SMG but it is mostly slow pacing, bad filming (fake ocean background!) and lame dialogue.

The funniest thing all week: seeing Anderson Cooper get all batsh*t excited to dish with the cast of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills on Anderson. Looking forward to the episode with his mother, Gloria the Great.

And God Said, Let There Be Gale and Natasha

As you may know, Gale Harold was my imaginary boyfriend from 2005-2009. We broke up when TG arrived on the scene, which made Gale cry. Now that some time has gone by and we've both healed, I view his work with joy detachment. Gale-aholics, you must already know he stars with goddess Natasha Henstridge in The Secret Circle (9/15) where they both are Hot As Beans, Witch-Style! Their combined gorgeousness might cancel each other out on screen. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EWK0vfwYhqA. I don't have high hopes for witch shows after my beloved Eastwick got axed, but this one has Gale and where there's Gale, there's a hit show (except for Vanished, Hellcats). Anderson Cooper's Anderson talk show (9/12) also starts, which should be tons of fun. Oooh, and Sarah Michelle Gellar's Ringer. Gotta watch!

Blake and Holly from Bachelor Pad are ENGAGED! I love this pair because they seem equally bubble-headed and nice, plus Michael was being a controlling tool and their relaysh had too much baggage. Dish feels one should never go back to an ex.

Candace Bushnell's novels are Dish's guilty pleasure and now I read that One Fifth Avenue is being made into TV series. It's no Jeffrey Eugenides, but I would never turn down an NYC-based Melrose Place! Hand me a cocktail and a bikini and I'm there. Oh wait, New York City. Hand me an Ambien and a pleather jacket and I'm there!

What's the big deal with SkinnyGirl Margarita pulled from shelves of Whole Foods? TG is crying buckets over this news. Is everything at Whole Foods really ALL natural? I'm not sure I believe this.

FYI--Halloween and Little House on the Prairie do not mix! Avoid at all costs. I don't like to see Half Pint all freaked out over Nells possibly beheading Mrs. Oleson-not even believable. Nells is such a p________.