Breaking Bad or Homeland? That Is the Question.

When Dish has a TV conundrum such as this, there is no choosing. Watch nothing! I haven't watched last week's BB. TG can't stand Homeland (even though he hasn't seen it, even though he loves Mandy Patinkin more than life itself), so we do work. But I cannot wait to watch both! Has Homeland jumped the terrorist shark? Will Walter White go to the white light?

In other news, SNL still stinks. And Jimmy Kimmel and Kanye are in a feud. At first, the tide seemed to go in JK's favor, but there's backlash to this tide. Like, why does Kanye get picked on all the time for being nuts? I won't say it because he's rude and nuts. I'm sure I'm not alone in feeling that this is beyond frivolous, as in why even bother aside from the comedy of it all...

I will learn from this since I'm sure I'll face negativity over my "art" in the next few months. I kind of don't want to hear it unless tactfully presented by, say, Katie Couric. Please, my fragile ego is only filtering in the BS right now. In secret, I am training like Jackie Chan, punching boards, sliding across roofs, hoarding yarn and puzzles while summoning some charm. If Kanye could dole out a little charm, I'd root for him in heartbeat.

Ps--reason for absence, following the rumor mill that Julia might be a b*tch in real life. There's not enough Xanax to cope with this possibility, as she is perfect.

Jon Tenney Graduates to Centrum Silver!

Dish took notice of this Closer dish in 1990 with Equal Justice. He was my imaginary boyfriend for a couple years, until Keanu Reeves rocked my world with Speed. What does this have to do with the price of pancakes? Today, Jon is much further into his fifties. Happy Birthday, Jon!

Mundane stuff that I'm following: John Kerry is probably going to be Secretary of State. I can totally see this. Current secretary Hillary Clinton got the stomach flu and then fainted and got a concussion. This is her parting gift after working like a dog? Give her a break, Health Fairies!

In trainwrecks, DJ Deadmau5 proposed to Kat Von D on twitter. I love my Ms. Von D, but fear that she always skates too close to the edge when it comes to the XYs. She said yes. I just ordered more of her fabulous lipsticks from Sephora!

An interesting tidbit written by Anonymous (who's written SO much over the last centuries) called Elimination Night about a number one reality show (um, ShmAmerican Shmidol?) and all the shenanigans behind the scenes. A character, like Shmennifer ShmLopez, is a total shmunt and Shmeven ShTyler is a bulge-tweeting letch. Another character resembling Shryan Shmeacrest is allegedly a highly functioning psychopath. I have it on pre-order, filled with joy that some people in the public eye are much more effed up than I am!

Finally, in celeb news, here is Mandy Patinkin losing his sh*t but in a most delightful way.
 
In summation, peace and love to the families who lost their children. I can't even imagine...

Wowzers, How about that Homeland and Dexter!?

Dexter is so majorly f*cked now that Deb caught him killing Tom Hanks's son! That's the problem when you kill someone on an altar in a church. It's so cliche! The pieces are breaking apart. Can Dex handle it? Of course, he can. He loves the challenge and there's the hope that he won't have to film with his ex-wife anymore if she gets killed off! Dish's comments on thinness: The actor who plays Joey Quinn looks extremely ill, like manorexia or coke/meth/heroin' thin. He's been wasting away in the last three seasons. Either that or it's the stress of being on two hit shows. Jennifer Carpenter is a little less gaunt, though overindulging on the pancake. It's like Ally McBeal all over.

I subjected TG to Homeland. I knew he'd like it because he has a thing for Mandy Patinkin. You should hear the squealing and whooping when he catches the barest glimpse of Man-Pat. TG tried to pretend he was reading his iPad but, really, his soft green eyes were avidly watching Mr. Grizzle deliver his lines so mellifluously.

So yeah, Ahnold is a lying douche, Adele is singing James Bond (perfect), Drew had a girl named Olive, and Seth MacFarlane will host the Oscars. The Academy Awards are where good comedians go to die.

I've decided that I will no longer utter the names Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton on this blog. Until they do something interesting.

Madame X is still on the lam.