Showing posts with label Charlize Theron. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Charlize Theron. Show all posts

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Happy Birthday, Dishmama!

Today she is on a jet plane, arriving way past her bedtime. We are at a loss how to celebrate when the goddess herself is in the air. I dove headlong into a movie marathon:

Safe House: Ryan Reynolds is an excellent action hero and he proves he can act in this thrill-packed CIA chase-reel. Denzel does his usual slick masterful mentor thing, killing some soldiers along the way. Predictable, repetitive, but what else is there? If you like watching things go boom, rent immediately. I loved it.

Young Adult: Another wit-tastic flick from Diablo Cody's pen. The sad thing is that I identified too much with the Charlize character, except I would never go back to my hometown to throw a big hissy over my first love. Life is hell. Charlize is perfect.

The Dictator: Far less irritating than Bruno or Borat. I laughed all the way through and enjoyed TG's hysterics. It was a nice change from his bitching at me to walk on the shady side of the street on our way to Union Square.

Mirror Mirror: I'm bewildered by how bad this is. I can't even stomach Julia. I hope she's screaming at whoever chose this project, even if it's to a mirror. I'm 10 minutes in, feeling that Julia needs Dish's help STAT to revive her career. I want her in an urban movie, playing a cold, beautiful socialite and screwing the daylights out of someone hot and not Tom Hanks. We've only seen her have sex in Sleeping with the Enemy (it made me uncomfortable) but it's time to shake things up and go for a less predictably Julia project (which is usually unpredictable, so by that, I would choose something I would predict she wouldn't choose).

The same advice for Tom Cruise--a career overhaul to deal with this next phase of life. No spacesuit or law enforcement stories. He was awesome in Rock of Ages but the movie seems to be tanking. Maybe the world doesn't want to see him shirtless anymore. I think he's brilliant when he wears a suit in a movie (Jerry Maguire, Lion for Lambs, Collateral). If his social life is going to hell, maybe Oscar should be his next goal.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Waiting for The Fame...

Dish and TG have two big press items about to appear. An article in a big newspaper and our appearance on a talk show. For now, we have to make do with being one of the Little People. C'mon, guys. We need to be out there. We're open to reality show offers. It will help finance our chicken/coffee farm overseas.

The news today is for the birds: Jen Aniston and Brad almost ran into each other at a movie theater. Sounds like a pile of BS to me. I'm sure these two pay people a lot of money not to casually run into each other. Charlize Theron was teased in high school. I'm putting a moratorium on beautiful actresses/models claiming they were hideous in childhood and bullied. There are pics everywhere of topless Michael Lohan in his hospital bed. He's having trouble speaking and breathing! If I were really sick, the first thing I'd do is get my pecs in the tabs.

We bagged The Artist as we were too lazy to go all the way to the Angelika. Caught up on our Andersons.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

I Love/Hate Netflix

Netflix prices are going up significantly. Those f*ckers. Hitting Dish where she lives. They know they've got a good product. I love hate them!

Today was a day for grim news. Say a prayer for the family of Leibby Kletzky, a nine-year-old Brooklyn boy who went missing yesterday and whose body was found today, victim of a grizzly murder. This is one of the few times when I wish New York had the death penalty.

RIP to Sherwood Schwartz--genius creator of The Brady Bunch.

We need a little cheering up, don't we? Ted Danson has been cast to take over the lead in CSI. I'm a huge Marg Helgenberger fan but I need more than one awesome star to get me to watch a show. This might do it. I heart Ted, especially since he's been playing these creepy roles (Damages).

Rodney King was busted again. He is still one handsome son of a gun. Even though he's a screwup, he will always have one good sentence (Can't we all just get along?). Isn't that what Hemingway tried to achieve?

Rumor has it Ryan Reynolds and Charlize Theron are dating exclusively. Huh? I can see it sort of. Her star power has faded in the last few years so it's a strategic choice on her part. Though, Green Lantern. Hmmmm.

Oh, Michele Bachmann has blown any chance she might have had to be President. You just don't go against the gays. They are too powerful and awesome.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGIkAglJMjQ

TG's quote of the day: "Men are from gin, women are from Diet Sprite."