She's My Hero!

Ryan Seacrest caused a stir by possibly not hosting American Idol due to stomach flu. But now she's my role model because she did the show and now I will too even if I can't breathe due to flowering juniper in the air which turns me into the Scratchy Queen of the Watering Eyes.

In other news, Barack is being groovy with Jimmy Fallon: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vAFQIciWsF4. Barack's a little stiff, but Jimmy and the Roots have it going on.

I'm eager to know what Hershey thought of last night's Glee. Kurt definitely took several stupid pills but let's hope it resulted in lots of spontaneous makeout sessions.

The John Edwards trial seems to be revealing the ick of this man. What could he possibly do except get sh*ttier haircuts to show he's not such an elitist douche.

Happier: Katherine Heigl and Josh adopted again.
Happier still: Jason Trawick is now her Britney Spears's conservator. I want a conservator. I'm tired of writing checks and ordering takeout--I mean, cooking hot meals for my man. Can't someone hire someone to do all this for me? Jason and Papa Spears, your services are needed here. Britney and I would totally get along.

Alexander McQueen at The Met

So worth the wait in line. Though if you're Dish-like, you *hate* crowds. Only McQueen's recognizable brilliance made me withstand the stop-start of shuffling gawkers like myself. I'll be dreaming about the red dresses, straight shoulders and S&M touches. Just get a membership to The Metropolitan Museum of Art and you can skip those lines. Yipee!

In high school, Katherine Heigl was the girl who found me useless. She was popular but had vicious habits behind closed doors (in-your-face flatulence, bulimia). Josh Duhamel was the hunk who paid no attention to me and was kind of a dick. He'd talk to me but have an eye for whoever was behind me. It was with some trepidation that I plopped in Life As We Know It. Verdict: Kind of cute, but Dish had a hard time getting past these two. They could be terrific in real life--except for the bad theater manners and nastiness to flight attendants. The material is average, perfect if you don't want a challenge.

According to Fitperez.com, Kathy Griffin maintains that diet and exercise are responsible for her skinniness at 50. She says she replaced unhealthy snacks with "fruits and veggies." On Broadway this spring, she was super-twiggy, a little strung-out looking. I'm sure this assessment would make her day. I love her!

Good Times

What sordid lives these people lead. Ex-Hef-fiansay told Howard Stern that sex with Hef lasted a few seconds. Ewww and can you BLAME HIM? He's a thousand years old and if I were surrounded by boobies all day, I'd grow tired and uninterested in flesh. Now people are defending Hef, testifying to his long-lasting libido. Ew.

More ew: A giant uproar about Katherine Heigl's being 20 minutes late to The Book of Mormon, disrupting viewers with these antics and then smoking an electric cigarette during the show. No manners. If I were rich, I'd still get to the show on time.

A special shout-out to John Amos, one of Dish's favorite actors. He's just so cuddly and magnetic on screen. At this moment, TG is immersed in an episode of Good Times, which, to Dish, is way better than The Munsters, his last obsession. I can tell how happy TG is by how often he wiggles his toes. Good Times = mega wiggle.

Pics of Rachel Weizs's wedding band have surfaced and she and I are kindred spirits. We have the same simple band.

Just when I was praising her business savvy, Kat Von D left two interviews and canceled the promotion for her new season of L.A. Ink, no doubt due to press over her recent breakup with Jesse James. This lady needs to have a serious talk with Shirley MacLaine, who performs even when she's yakking her brains out. Stiff upper lip. Do the job.