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Life Is...

...all about exchanging money, pleasing others and running errands.

Cougar Cubs Dropping Like Flies!

Finally am watching Burlesque. Aguilera leaves her crappy job, has big boobs, wants to make it in a big city where Cher works. Oh no, you can't work here, Cher says. Who do you think you are, talented? I'm somebody, Agui says, now watch me work it by grinding against this chair. She does and they all stop rolling their eyes. Stanley Tucci is slack-jawed with amazement. Girl, you're hired! Jealousy, cat fight, romance, etc... My fave is Julianne Hough. She's the only one who looks as if she's having fun. Alan Cumming's gift is wasted though I do have an hour left.

Here's Julianne in another movie. Cannot wait to see Tom Cruise rock, a little reminiscent of Magnolia and Tropic Thunder:

She's Gotta Go to Rehab, She Said Maybe, Maybe, Maybe But Only as Outpatient

Like that works for someone who keeps crawling back into the bottle/pipe! Addiction is scary so let's send Brooke Mueller healing vibes. She seems to have a serious, serious problem. Those two boys are cute, she's pretty so why can't everything be perfect? Who knew chaos would ensue all those years ago when she swooshed into Sheen's life moments after Denise left him. Those kids need non-dysfunctional nannies to raise them. As I write this frantic post, Fantasia herself is in labor.

Ah, women in transition. Creating and destroying. Dish spent the evening checking out stars in unflattering bikinis on radaronline.com. It made me feel so much better to see Cindy Crawford's normal lady gut. Another piece of banana bread for me. If they can jiggle, so can I!

Lindsay got her purse stolen in Hawaii. Didn't this happen when she went to Cannes and had to face the judge but couldn't get back because she had no ID? She is like a modern-day Job this one.

Just caught up with Dexter. The show seems to want Jennifer Carpenter and Michael C. Hall to make out and this must be *so* uncomfortable for them. Jen has looked haggard this season and I wonder, how is she coping? He seems to have moved on quickly. The finale looks fantastic. Even TG, who says Dexter is "stupid", gazed fixedly at the preview. Collin Hanks wasn't as frightening as Trinity, but he's better than last season.

Khloe and Lamar Will Do Dallas!

I've never watched their show but I know they are going to Dallas. They're allegedly getting fertility treatments and they have sex...a lot. Every clip I turn on (not often, I swear) that Khloe is talking about banging. Good for her but you have to do something else. When he retires, I worry about all that time together. Well, I really don't. Who knew these kids would make it!?

This weekend, I needed a mood-boost so I started reading Jane Lynch's Happy Accidents. So far, nice parents, gawky childhood, big lesbian secret, drinking at an early age. In my gaggle of imaginary best friends, you need one crowd-pleaser and Jane is it for me. Every time she's on screen, I can't help but smile. In fact, let's watch this (warning--contains the F word a few times): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vV_drM1jW58&list=HL1323643214&feature=mh_lolz.

New Year's Eve is #1 at the B.O. So many stars in one movie. It's bound to be bad (Evening, Valentine's Day), but juicy. Must see!

Lindsay Lohan's Leaked Playboy Pics...

...are not wildly amazing, though her body is celebrity-tastic with her "blond" hair, huge gazongas and skinny legs. She is artfully arranged on a bed like Marilyn. Zzzzz.

Though not a fan of J. Edgar, I loved Hereafter. My friends didn't. Then again, I love woo-woo material as long as it seems realistic (i.e. not Harry Potter but big yes for The Gift) and this one explores life after death with three stories. Matt Damon plays a John Edward psychic character, though much poorer and more temperate. At one point the French subtitles disappeared, which caused me panic until I remembered I'm fluent so I just sat back and enjoyed the music of the frogs. A little cheesy at the end, but enjoyed. Nicely done, Clint.

Thanks to the artistry of JJ, I am very Annette Bening these days with short hair. Someone said that I was more Meg Ryan from City of Angels. I'll take it!

Star Sighting--Richie Rich!!!

7:10pm at a restaurant on Seventh Avenue: TG and I went in to crash DM's girl party downstairs when I spotted fashion designer/celebutante Richie Rich avidly listening to a friend at the bar. He stood out like a sparkling star against a dreary black night. I tried not to stare and just followed TG to see the other shining beacon of light, Mama-la. Seeing RR was so exciting and a nice boost since my cat had just pissed on the couch.

Today's Question: Did my mother play Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons while I was in the womb? It is the *only* explanation for why I get goosebumps and teary every time I hear their songs. I might have to see Jersey Boys again and drag her with me so that I can solve the mystery. Either that or a Shirley MacLaine past-life regression, STAT!

TV catchup: The Office, I'm over Robert California and the whole show. Only Dwight and Jim sparring rocks my world. Elisabeth Shue is replacing Marg Helgenberger on CSI starting in February, which is brilliance! Remember The Saint (All roads lead back to Duran Duran--and if you know how, please say so!)?

Failed diet: On the subway, I skimmed through more Tony Robbins and discovered he even has dieting advice. Eat water-based foods, no dairy, try to avoid meat, protein not THAT great for you, etc... Just today, Dish tried to obey but then dessert arrived. A parfait. I can't say no to parfait, which led to chocolate. Then gnocchi later and then peanut brittle (damn you, TG, for enabling). My season is screwed.

Banning Sexy Video = Success for Duran Duran!

They've done it again! A Duran Duran video (the modelicious "Girl Panic") has been banned, which means eventual global domination. I couldn't be prouder of my boys! A little tear rolls down Dish's cheek, though this could be sleep deprivation and overwork. Is it Friday yet? Please, let the lambs stop screaming. If if they're screaming, let them scream "The Reflex" i.e. the happiest song on Earth.

I love it when celebs over-explain their rudeness and don't show remorse for the ill treatment of the little people. Alec Baldwin goes on an articulate tirade on Huffpo: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/alec-baldwin/american-airlines-service-_b_1135201.html, sticking his cankle further into buffalo poop by dissing Greyhound. I dig that flying sucks these days (though I love you, JetBlue and Air Canada--except when flying back to the States since you ALWAYS delay but you're so nice about it). Travel is stressful. Why can't every traveler just shut the f*ck up for a few hours until back on solid ground? Alec is a brilliant actor for all his anger tissues.

In love news, Survivor host Jeff Probst married Lisa Ann Russell. Congrats, you two!