Friday, February 05, 2010

Politics Is My (Tea) Bag

There's so much in the news about the Tea Party. Beyond what happened in 1776, I can't imagine what this means. From TV coverage, it looks like a grass roots campaign of fat religious people who are pissed and want change. I've decided we need a bolder mandate so Dish is starting The Pee Party. The bylaws include:

1. Drink at least 2 liters of water a day except on days when giving long speeches. Watch how often you go to the bathroom and how your urine becomes transparent.

2. If you include vitamins in this regimen, all bets are off as your pee turns neon yellow.

3. Abolish student loans.

4. It's better to have guests over since you can make your pee hit the bowl so as not to make a sound. If in a foreign bathroom, it could be loud and then people would know you have bodily functions.

5. Include a sin tax on alcohol and cigarettes.

6. We know how asparagus affects these bylaws so let's not even go there.

I took a break from my political strategizing and my new mission by watching Notorious with the notorious TG. I made him drink lots of water.

3 comments:

John Haracopos said...

"The Tea Party" is not for Eloise anymore...
How did a name that defined the social set of ladies who lunch in hotel parlors, come to define a bunch overfed white bible beating racist pigs that love a drive-thru meal???
Addition To The Bylaws: All members must be forced to "Tea Bag" a dirty, stinky nut-sack while having a bible forced up their bum!

Anonymous said...

That's taking it a little far, JJ. Free speech is an inalienable right even for overweight self-righteous sows.

HersheyKiss said...

Tea party, shmee party. Tea bagging is where it's at!! Nothing like KSK dropping a heavy bag on my face.