Another Day, Another Photo of LeAnn Rimes in a Bikini

Screw that, today's hot-throbbing news is that our beloved wackadoo Fred Willard was arrested for open wang-love in a special kind of theater. Poor TG is crying in his Grape Nuts/chocolate almond milk since he'd take a bullet for Fred. Willard was allegedly fired from his PBS show Market Warriors. Kick a man when he's down. Mucho double-entendre, Dishita.

Speaking of disgraced weiners, Anthony Weiner with baby in tow graces the cover of today's Post. I smell a new run for office. Did I not call this the second the scandal broke? The pubic public will forgive you, especially if you spin yourself as Stay-at-home Dad. I'm appalled, shocked, and can't wait to see what happens next.

Bon Jovi on American Idol? YES! I'd watch it, even though he and Dame Edna ruined Season 5 of Ally McBeal. And he's long overdue for a modern haircut.

More reports are surfacing of Griffith and Banderas on the rocks. She's at home soaking her face in ice, the cigarette down to an ash. He's out dirty dancing with some muy caliente chickita. Please stop raining on my parade! I love them.

Rafael Nadal drops out of Olympics. Where is the sun?