Monday, January 21, 2013

Lovers' Quarrel?

The second I saw this picture years ago, I went on an imaginary gay safari filled with conversations and wild orgies I could hear/see from my zipcar window. No way is this not gay, I thought, until I remembered what it was like to be a cycle widow. This sight is a familiar one. The boys take a few bong hits and go out for a nine-hour ride, roaming in colorful packs and stopping in bagel and burger places along the way. They talk about their asses, the latest gossip and whose ass is the fattest. It's not gay, but a little gay adjacent. So I have to pin all my hopes on a liaison between Gyllenhaal and McConaughey. With his doobies, drums, trance-like beach yoga, Matty must get the sexes confused now and then. And Jake, I'm sure he paid to make out with Heath Ledger because that would be a logical thing to do. I mean, have you seen that movie? I know the truth must be very boring, but a girl can dream, right? I'm just trying to jazz up their stories. Don't ride too close to MM because he doesn't wear deodorant.

But what was the original point? Oh right. So Matthew was upset about Lance's doping, but he understood why his friend would keep it a secret--because Lance didn't want to burden Matthew with the knowledge of his doping. If that's not love, I don't know what is.

I'm a huge fan of the Post's Linda Stasi. Her insight always hits me the right way. She got me to bump off Real Housewives from my DVR and watch Kevin Bacon in The Following instead. I can't resist serial killer stories.

Saw the inauguration (sp?). Beyonce CAN sing. But not liking Michelle's bangs. I don't think they look good even on Anna Wintour. Oh god, maybe I've gone too far.

Since I can only stick to a "diet" for one week, I'm doing a year of diets. Last week, I started meditating. Didn't make a bit of difference. This week, no Facebook, unless summoned.

No comments: