Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Damn Dog

Dish is a slave to work, buried so thoroughly it probably wasn't the dead dog in Marley & Me that caused an eruption of tears. This is so not a spoiler alert. Everyone knows that all pet movies end in animal death where we learn the lesson that pets are precious empaths. The humans in Marley & Me, Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston, possess the spice of a dry potato while "Marley" rages, frolicks, destroys like Britney Spears during post-partum depression. Would that we could all bound through a restaurant, carrying a table behind us, chew up a couch, almost fall out of a moving car. Moral of the story: F&ck it. Moral II of the story: realistic animals + antics that destroy sets + semi-okay dialogue but nothing earth-shattering = blockbuster movie!

My long-time friend Shamrock Shake is coming with me to find celebrity haunts. We are a good (NOT romantic) team because he accepts my peculiarities without question, we have similar levels of insanity, drink club soda therefore are cheap dates, and have super-senses. He is a writer, probably soon to be famous-ish, and needs material. I just need to see some stars.

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