Just Your Average Horny Devil

I'll admit to being slightly turned on by Eastwick and the Jack Nicholson lookalike, Paul Gross (though he needs to get rid of the mullet--it's ruining the Dish fantasy). Rebecca Romijn's boobs are enormous, spilling out of her bra in every frame. I enjoy the power of the three women and a sexy devil so I might keep watching. It's not rocket science, it's not Charmed or Bewitched, but as far as witchiness goes, beggers can't be choosers.

So far, though, my butt could have written this fall season. Here's what I'd call my pilot: Buttsville. In one part of suburbia lives a quirky blended family called the Schitz. Clay Schitz is the quirky pervy patriarch, Amber Schitz has a quirky drug problem while loving her children and superficial social network. Their son John Schitz is having a secret tryst with arch Schitz nemesis, Aria Phartwagon. Dish is so sick of the hey-how-ya-doin' dialogue, the characters who care, the little habits that make them unique. Three nurse shows, too many Grey's Anatomy knockoffs, CSI-NCIs had hot animal sex and produced octoplets. It's stale!